the weird thing is
that i never felt like you were all the way here yet
all the way dear
yes.
girl, Don’t Ever Doubt
i did feel you were a friend.

hell
you almost felt like a daughter
and that must be why this hurts
so.
and i can’t believe you’re gone.

it’s a constant struggle attempting to understand
why bad people happen to good souls
and how life curdles on the sweetest folks
and why Our Father wants the Angels first.

and i can’t believe you’re gone
and i almost can’t even believe you were here
and i can’t believe i couldn’t do anything
and i can’t believe you weren’t even near